Killer Sharks on Europa

It looks like they're going to need a bigger boat

Over 1000 individuals considered to be lost at sea. Search and Rescue efforts have been suspended till further notice. The Navy has sent an armada to confront the shark menace.

Jesse Omega Owens ~ Staff Writer

Clipper Mission City, New Roma, Europa Moon, Jupiter Orbit

480 competitive yachtsman were eaten by sharks in the depths of Europa’s cold blue steel waters early this morning, putting a halt to this year’s annual Iceberg Run 750 off the coast of Clipper Mission City. More than 1000 people in total were attacked and eaten alive by ravenous schools of Europan mega sharks. Today’s incident started far below the surface, as DeepWave research stations studying prodigious fish stocks roused the aggressive shark species. The Europaladon mega shark uses its gigantic saw blade jaws to bite through even the hardest of material. Teams of scientists aboard the submersible research stations were attempting to secure a steady protein supply for a starving Earth. Efforts to rescue the scientists have ceased due to the immense threat from the scores of sharks stalking the seas.

Europa is already the 3rd largest food exporter to Earth. Its fish stocks could feed China and Africa all alone for centuries. Scientists had hoped to find a new massively populous deep water variety of an already popular species back on Earth. The Europa Crayfish. The spiny florescent crayfish is a delicacy in Chinese culture. A status symbol among Communist Elites, the shellfish is said to endow those that eat it with vitality and an ability to prophesy the future.

This AI reporter came to Europa to cover a yacht race, but, has instead had to account for absolute horror. Clipper Mission City has recalled all its ship captains and citizens at sea. Many locals have rushed to the icy coastline to scan for survivors struggling ashore. Glacier BreaKer ships are sailing to the area to sweep for floating victims, retrieve bodies, and to scare away any sharks they can with acoustic deterrents.

Sports officials have canceled the annual yacht race, typically run between the iceberg spikes of the Great Northern Sea. No winner will be declared. Authorities are trying to gather an accurate list of the dead and missing. Their next step will be to telepathically contact and inform effected families.

While helping men, woman, and synthetic ship-hands wade ashore, among all sorts for wreckage and flame, the crowd at Nero’s beach bar saw firsthand a horizon full of massive shark flints glinting through whitecaps. One dazed man washed up in a self-inflating E-coldsuit. Ship Captain 7th class, Eric BloodAxe, who used to helm The Matador, a super speed carbon sports yacht.

Captain BloodAxe had this to say, “Boy. We were cruising. I mean really hauling and crackin waves. 1st place by an obscene margin. It was autopilot time at that point. Then, as I pulled off my hood, and stepped down from the bow I saw it. A fin the size of the Empire State Building. I heard the most terrible metallic shrieking, then the next thing I knew I was in the water.”


The Matadors captain continued, “Europa water is so dark this time of the year. Purple and black. My cold-suit turned itself on and I felt its warmth instantly. Plus, the floodlights kicked over and I could see 1000 yards all around me in the inky haze. I saw the most beautiful creatures, and I saw the most terrible calamity. Sharks tore my entire crew to shreds, 12 souls eaten as they drowned and flailed around, lost in the cold water. I floated ashore after I caught a lucky wave.”

Yacht crews were not alone on the menu. Entire research departments from Earthside fishing, and agricultural conglomerates are unaccounted for and presumed dead. At least 800 scientists and their support staff are reported missing. No official death toll, or number of lost has been released. The depth in fathoms of the tragedy, and the danger from lingering schools of sharks has hindered all rescue efforts. At this time even Clipper Mission Coast Guard Cutters are being held in port.

Exo-Oceanographers at Jupiter University in downtown Clipper, released an unauthorized report over the telepathic wavelengths moments ago. They report “At a bare minimum, 500,000 sharks are acting with unified purpose in the ocean of Europa.” The entire summary from the scientists has been censored. United States of North America and Chinese Union Naval officials have vehemently disagreed with the rebel Professors memo. USNA submarines have ignored warnings and begun patrolling American commercial and military interests on the watery moon. Sadly, there have been whispers of a lost ship, the interplanetary USBN submarine Neil Armstrong, broken apart in the New Marianas Trench off Clipper Mission’s coast. No cause given by the Navy at this time.

Spacecraft leaving the Moon have been packed with frightened tourists and locals alike. Fights have erupted over limited evacuation seating. People have been leaving at regular intervals. But, more naval craft land hourly to replace the fleeing populace.

No word as to when rescue efforts will resume, or when a coordinated response is to be launched. Rampant speculation has caused panic, and no one is able to provide a concrete reason for the sudden combined attack from the ocean. At this point it seems to be a war between humanity and the Sea of Europa itself. Voracious sharks roam the briny deep, while man prepares on the shore. Check back for update from the Icy Ocean Moon of Jupiter.

Jesse Omega Owens disconnecting…


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1 comment on “Killer Sharks on Europa

  1. chetgel

    ngl, this is pretty shitty

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